Or like when you have a cold so you stay home from work to cocoon yourself in blankets, watch TV, nap, and snack all day. Sounds pretty amazing. But it's not because you have a cold and now you've got snot on your blankets, you've caught up on your programs and are stuck watching courtroom shows, your nap is not restful because you can't breathe, and your snacks taste like nothing.
Or like that celebrity who is super, uber famous and beloved but who has actually made a few box office duds that we try not to talk about. Steve Carell in Evan Almighty, Ben Affleck in Gigli, Emma Thompson in Treasure Planet, anyone who's ever starred in the third sequel of anything (excepting Harry Potter), and so on.
Which finally brings me to my point. Anthropologie. First, why is it spelled that way? I can only imagine it's because when juxtaposed with a blurb on their spirit of "philanthropie," it makes for some cute copy-based branding. It's cool. I love alliteration and rhyming so no judgement, just curiosity.
Sure, they've got awesome stuff. Really awesome stuff. Stuff that is ahead of trends, but not so much that it isn't relatable. That's why we love Anthro. We love it so much that we fancy ourselves its best friend; we gave it a nickname like we're totally casual and cool. I believe pretentious fans of Mumford and Sons have done it, too (the internet cannot confirm this, but the douchy guy next to me at the concert kept calling them "Mumfs." Side note: THANKS FOR NOTHING, INTERNET!).
Anyway, nobody says Anthropologie. It's just Anthro.
People speak of Anthro as though anything that ever came out of its deepest, darkest, dirtiest crevice is actually the shining star that will guide us to world peace and unlimited Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. All I'm saying is that this can't possibly be true. Yes, there are probably 30 different Anthro-related hashtags. Yes, there is Anthro-inspired clothes, housewares, jewelry, shoes, and probably cheese platters. Anthro isn't just an entity, it inspires other entities. It is its own era, its own style, its own theory.
But everyone makes mistakes.* And all this has been just a really lengthy way of saying I found some severed kitty hands there.**
*I work in retail and it occasionally happens that we poke fun at some of our products because it helps keep us sane. But then it gets awkward when you're like that is the ugliest pair of microwavable slippers I've ever seen! And then your coworker is like really? I bought some for everyone in my bridal party. Opinions are fun.
**They're supposed to be bear paws, which I can see I guess. Regardless, are they poised to be handcuffed or bound in some fashion?
